My Kingdom for a Bath


August 14, 2013 by Marj Hatzell


I know, first world problems and whatnot, but we haven’t had a functional bath tub in two years.

At nearly the exact time we finished the “fully operational bathroom station” (master bath) we discovered that the tub wasn’t JUST overflowing from Titanic re-enactments and pouring through our kitchen ceiling. Oh no. It ALSO has to be leaking and we can’t discover the source of the leak. We can take showers. Fortunately. And also fortunately, at precisely the time we discovered the leak we FINALLY got the boys taking showers instead of baths.

But in order to fix it, we have to gut the bathroom. The thing is, the beam under the bathroom also needs to be fixed/gutted and supported (thank you, 80s prefab house builders). But we currently still don’t have floors. And to replace the floors, we have to fix the MAIN support beam in our house. You know, the one holding up the whole place? Because if we put down floors before the beam is fixes the floors will shift, see. And we didn’t discover the beam issue until we took down the drop ceiling and pulled up the carpet in the basement last month, due to Bugaboo stimming on the ceiling tiles and peeing on the floor (long story).

So basically it comes down to this:

I can’t take a hot bath until the entire bathroom is gutted, the leak is fixed and the bathroom remodeled.

We can’t fix the bath until we fix the floors.

We can’t fix the floor until we fix the structural stuff.

It’s like living a real-life, “Give a Mouse a Cookie.” Except in reverse. And there’s no cookie at the end.

And that’s about the time The Guy I Live With had car issues. You know, the one he uses to drive back and forth to work, 50+ miles a day? The one we need to be dependable? Yep. That one.

It’s also when we realized I need braces because my lower teeth are moving together and overlapping and I’m having issues with them. And we have no adult orthodontics coverage.

And also when both our washer and dryer stopped working properly. Which, fortunately for us, TGILW can fix JUST ABOUT ANYTHING and got them working, though we still ended up with a new washer.

Overwhelming to have all of these house issues looming over us, to say the least. And the $$$ it involves. CHA CHING! CHA CHING! CHA CHING!

Calgon, take me away! Oh wait. We don’t have a tub.

Maybe I’ll fit in the laundry sink?

One thought on “My Kingdom for a Bath

  1. Becky says:

    I feel your pain dear. I haven’t had a functional main bathroom in 5 YEARS. Not because the hubs can’t do it, but because he just doesn’t.

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