Opposite Day Manifesto


October 3, 2012 by Marj Hatzell

I love that my kids have to take medication just to function for a fraction of the day.

My house looks awesome right now, what with the spackle dust, half-finished drywall and sub-floors  In fact, I heart sub-floors so hard. I hope it stays in this “50% finished” mode for a long time.

Nothing makes me happier than rain. Because rain + dogs = dogs slathered in mud=mud all over my house and it brings me so much joy.

I’ve been going on 2-4 hours of sleep a night on a regular basis for year and I feel awesome! So awesome, in fact, that I don’t NEED to sleep all night ever again!  I’ll just keep waking up and stay up,even when Bugaboo sleeps. It’s so productive.

I’m glad I gained weight because I haven’t been sleeping and I’ve been ditching the gym. I feel so much better about myself.

I’m thrilled I’m turning 40.

I am happy to have grey hair.

Wrinkles? I look fabulous with them! In fact, I am hoping the chasm in the middle of my eyebrows gets bigger because I wanna look even more awesome.

People who talk on their cell phones while driving are thoughtful people and are the epitome of safe driving.

I’m not looking forward to Eat-and-Sleep Weekend AT ALL. Not one bit. Nope.



12 thoughts on “Opposite Day Manifesto

  1. I agree on it all but the age- I’ve got you beat there. I LOVED turning 45!
    I also love 30+ puzzles being done at once, on the floor of his room, from a large pile of pieces I just swept together.

    I love knowing he in there but not knowing how to reach him when he’s upset or in a melt down. I love the great parent feeling it gives me.

    I love not worrying about what’s coming next. I never have enough to do with myself.

    I, too, love renovating/rehabing the house and watching the boy play with any tools left out. I know he will not harm himself, others or the structural integrity of our home when I forget to put tools away.

    Happy Opposite Day. One day a year it doesn’t sound so weird!

  2. jimreeve says:

    I love it when my son comes home with an hour of homework. And I also love it when he has rough days too.

  3. Rachel Jones says:

    i love it when my “lady cycle” is all hosed up becaue i am getting all old and stuff, so my fits of estrogen-induced psycosis are really unpredictable. I love the fact that i assume all teachers look at my kids and see only autism because some crap-ball teacher did that for an entire year. I love that I feel like if I dont dot all the i’s and cross all the t’s, it is all going to fall apart and I will NEVER get it back together again. Chaos rocks.

  4. I love being unemployed, being broke, and phone calls from bill collectors… It’s the best. Opposite day is not fun, we should never do it again. 😉

  5. Janet says:

    ~ I love the art work my son has done on the walls. It is so cool that he used things that don’t wash off because I can keep it a long time!
    ~ I love that he figured out that pee’ing against the side of my mattress and box springs (where the waterproof cover doesn’t cover) will allow the pee to soak in. It is also cool that I am constantly reminded of this due to the aroma.
    ~ I am really, really sad that I hit the big 55 in January and will start getting a senior discount while my youngest is 10 and will get a child discount.
    ~ On the other hand it is cool to be this age and have not gone through “the change” yet. Adding to this excitement is my 11 & 13 year old daughters going through puberty together.

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