April 25, 2011 by Marj Hatzell
We’re down to T-minus twenty-two hours and twenty minutes until the magical school bus arrives to take Bugaboo to his totally awesome school. He’s ready. I’m ready. We’re all ready.n
It hasn’t been the best school break but it certainly hasn’t been the worst. He’s kept himself occupied at home very well and I’ve kept him busy as well. I made sure we had plenty of shopping and fun events (zoo and amusement park) and walks in our neighborhood and trips to the park and babysitting and dog sitting and…busy week. I need a long nap after this week. Maybe a few days. Thik I could get away with staying in bed for three or four days? Maybe? Please?
I think it would have gone much more smoothly if he slept well. And I’ve referenced that. But it turns out I AM NOT CRAZY. Ok, I totally am but I KNEW something was up. I mean, I had a feeling something wasn’t quite right. I couldn’t understand for the life of me why a kid that takes an elephant’s dose of sleep medication PLUS ten mgs of melatonin would have so much trouble falling asleep. And staying asleep. I mean, short of knocking him out the old-fashioned way (bonk on the head) what else could I have done? We took him for rides. We gave him many baths, took him for many walks, got him as tired as we could. And still. He’d be up until one in the morning and sleep until four? Maybe?
Then, Saturday morning, The Guy I Live With made a passing comment that made time stand still and made all color drain from my face. I was getting the boys’ morning meds ready and he said (all proud of himself), “Did you notice I combined the three bottles of melatonin into one bottle? I found two more of them behind the tray with all of the pills so I poured them into one.” And normally that would have made sense. I mean, the bottles are half empty, since they insist on shoving wads of cotton in there, right? Combining them saves shelf space! Great idea! IF THEY WERE ALL THE SAME DOSAGE OF MELATONIN. That’s right! The Guy I Live With put ONE MG and THREE MG in the bottle with the TEN MG. Right on top, even! So when I thought I was digging out a TEN MG tablet? I WAS PROLLY ONLY GIVING HIM ONE. And before you ask me how I didn’t notice the pill looked different? It’s because they don’t! They are all small, dissolving tablets that are easier for Bugaboo to take. Meaning, they aren’t marked. And the same color. And the bottles are nearly identical except for the part of the label that gives the dosage. And the reason we had them in there was because one month when I went to buy them they were all out of 10mgs so I got 3s and 1s to make TEN. Get it? For those of you not good at math it would be (3)3mgs plus (1) 1mg. See? TEN! Except NOT TEN. Because I most likely only gave him one. ONE MG.
See where this is going?
Yeah. Momma was not a happy camper, to say the least. And when I said to The Guy I Live With (through teeth clenched so hard I could taste blood), “Did you check to see if the bottles were the SAME DOSAGE?” He meekly replied, “Um. I love you?”
And people wonder why I’m going insane.