For Crying Out Loud!


January 28, 2011 by Marj Hatzell

I hate to joke about it, but I have to because that’s my life and I insist on doing it.

Why is it that I can teach Bugaboo to do so much for himself and yet EVERY MORNING when I go into the upstairs bathroom, there is no roll of toilet paper on the holder? Hmmm?? And I almost EXCLUSIVELY USE the downstairs bathroom? And have to replace that one every stinking day as well? There ARE three other people living here. Two of them have enough common sense to reach under the sink, pull out a new roll, use it and stick it on the back of the toilet. Or on the sink. But NOT ON THE TOILET PAPER HOLDER. Do they have a toilet paper disability?

In other news, today I had a hearty guffaw because I received some paperwork in the mail. Oh, the paperwork actually wasn’t that funny. The reason I laughed was IN the papers I received, silly! See, I participate in research studies and whatnot and fill out tons of forms and assessments and developmental questionnaires to, you know, help out? And some long-awaited results came in. See, they want to make sure your kids are ACTUALLY AUTISTIC if you participate in an autism research study. For laughs, and stuff. So they do testing. Autism scales and whatnot. Just like the ones we’ve already done twenty times before. And the results? YUP. STILL AUTISTIC. HAHAHAHAHA!!!! Sorry, I always get a big laugh over that, for some reason. As if I don’t already know.

Also, also wik, the other day I was filling out ONLINE questionnaires and one of the questions asked about developmental milestones, in this case, walking. I put down that Bugaboo walked at 8 months and Bug Boy was a second older than nine months. You know, because it was true and all. And when I clicked submit, I got an error message that said, “PLEASE RECHECK YOUR ANSWER. THAT RESULT IS NOT TYPICAL.”

No sh*t Sherlock! I mean, HELLO! I KNOW THAT! That’s why we’re here.

Sheesh. No respect, I tells ya.

7 thoughts on “For Crying Out Loud!

  1. akazookeeper says:

    LOL. In my house, we have tp problems too. We also have a house where I am the only girl and people are constantly pissing on the seat. So I taped a sign to the toilet that said : The hands that clean this toilet also make your food. Aim appropriately! LOL. It worked for a few days.

  2. Most of those questionnaires crack me up. They want yes or no answers, and there’s so much gray.

  3. Beth says:

    The toilet paper holder issue is a guy thing, not an autism thing. I noticed a huge improvement in DH’s ability to load a toilet paper holder when we moved to a house where the tp holder is just a prong, open on one end, so all he has to do is slide the **** thing on.

    • dg says:

      I actually meant thay my severely disabled kid can figure it out, why can’t the “normal” adult husband? Hm? Either he is secretly using a bidet or he’s not wiping his *ss.

  4. Stimey says:

    “That answer is not typical.” Oh, that’s good stuff right there. Classic.

  5. Jessica says:

    I seem to be the only one in my house who knows how to put toilet paper on the holder, I hope that someday I have a few more people on my side like you do!

  6. Every time I go into the bathroom the toilet paper is precariously perched on top of the holder. Like it’s magically going to spring itself onto the rollie thing. And it does: By the magic of Mom. EVERY FRICKIN’ TIME.

    I’m trying to let it go. I really am.

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