September 17, 2010 by Marj Hatzell
Last night I called my sister (who lives in another state a few hours away) and her eight-year-old-probably-autistic-but-undiagnosed-son answered the phone. And if there’s one thing you should know about autistic kids and kids on the spectrum in general, it’s this: They have no filter.
The conversation went something like this:
Me: Hi Buddy! It’s Aunt DG!
Him: HI AUNT DG! I MISS YOU SO MUCH! HOW ARE YOU? WE WERE JUST AT YOUR HOUSE. I RIDE THE BUS TO SCHOOL AND SO DOES LITTLE BROTHER. HOW IS YOUR NEW DOG?
Me: Huh? Uh, I miss you, too! Daisy and Bristol are fine. Hey, is your Mommy there? I just want to ask her a quick questions before I get Bugaboo out of the tub and ready for bed.
Him: No. They aren’t home!
Me: Oh, do you have a babysitter?
Him: NO! We don’t have a babysitter!
Me: Um. Are you home by yourselves?
Him: No, silly! Holly’s here!
Me(phew): So do you know when Mommy and Daddy will be home then?
Him: Um. No.
Me: Can you give them a message for me and tell them Aunt DG called?
Him: SURE! In fact, they will be home to put us to bed and I’ll tell them! They’re at that thing at that place. Um. What’s it called? YOU KNOW!!!
Me: Um. No, I don’t know.
Him: C’mon, Aunt DG! It’s that place where they go and talk. You know. That place. The place they go so that MY MOM STOPS YELLING AT MY DAD.
Me (pretty embarrassed now): Uh, counseling? Therapy?
Him: COUNSELING! YEAH!
Me: Alrighty then. Tell ’em I called. Give your brother a kiss for me.
Him: I AM NOT KISSING HIM.
Me: Ok! Bye!
Ahem. Yeah. No filter. Like, I’m sure my sister wants him to tell people that on the phone (and now I’ve done gone and told the whole Internets). Can you imagine? Teacher calls and eight-year-old answers it and says, “SHE CAN’T COME TO THE PHONE RIGHT NOW! SHE’S YELLING AT MY DAD!” Kinda reminds me of when Bug Boy did THIS to me. Good times, good times.
Sometimes autism is really quite funny. Good for a few laughs. And tears. But mostly laughs.