July 16, 2008 by Marj Hatzell
Ok kids, DG is in a funky-arse mood. That means she needs a hot bath or a hot toddy or a hot poker or…all three. DG needs your help with the following:
- I leave for vacation in a month. Should I get my hair cut NOW and then it will grown in a bit before then? Should I wait two weeks and have it more refreshed or wait until the last minute so I have a fresh ‘do?
- I am in no mood to cook dinner. Should I make everyone eat leftovers? Should I make fries and sandwiches? Should I do breakfast for dinner? Should we do takeout?
- Bugaboo had the BEST DAY EVER yesterday. That, of course, means he is starting to get sick. He woke up this morning with a runny nose but was otherwise fine. Should I keep him home? Should I send him until the teacher or school nurse calls me? Should I send him and hid and not answer my phone?
- The house is quite tidy and laundry and dishes are caught up. RARE. Should I do extra cleaning today? Should I read a book and take a nap? Should I take Bug Boy someplace special? Should I rent him a video game (Baaaaaaaad mommy) so he leaves me alone for a few hours?
- DG needs to shave so that her new tankini doesn’t make her look like a hippy with, AHEM, extra hair. In this town, though, it is the norm. Should I do a bikini shave? Should I shave it all for a change of pace? Should I do “the landing strip”? Should I just leave it and tell the husband he has to deal?
- I’ve had purple toe nails for three weeks no. I usually do electric blue (so that I look cyanotic) or wicked witch green. I’m thinking of changing it. Should I keep the funky colors? Should I do, *GASP*, a shade of RED? Should I do a french manicure on my toes? Should I take it all off and go au naturale?
- We’re driving across the country in ONE MONTH. Yes, I am insane. Should we take our standard DVD player? Should we pack the Wii this time? Should I leave all electronics at home so we talk more and have more family bonding time? Or I am completely off my rocker in thinking that my kids will behave for three days in a car without SOMETHING TO DISTRACT THEM???
- Speaking of driving across the country, we need hotel suggestions. We typically stay in one chain, but they rarely have pools. They do, however, have a PHAT breakfast bar in the morning and they are always clean and moderately priced. And quiet. Do we stay there and say the heck with the pool? Look for places with a pool so that the kids can swim at night when we stop? Go even cheaper and do Motel 6 and McD’s for breakfast? Where have you stayed?
- I am thinking I will chronicle my trip. That means I need a laptop. The husband will bring his and his Crackberry. Should I insist on using his? Throw a hissy fit and buy a laptop? Borrow one from someone? We will need one that can get Wifi. Hmmmm…
- I’m gonna miss my dog. Should I bring a picture of her? Should I call for daily updates? Or am I neurotic and need to take a chill pill? (DO NOT ANSWER THAT ONE)
Phew. I really need your help on these. I’m feeling somewhat indecisive (CAN YOU TELL?) and could use someone to point me in the right direction. Thanks, y’all. I knew I could count on you. Y’all are the best cyber stalkers friends a girl could ever have.