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Things That Make Me Go Hmmmm…

6

May 13, 2008 by Marj Hatzell

Alrighty.  Can anyone answer these questions for me?  Inquiring minds wanna know:

  • Why do the most miserable people on the planet work at Panera? I mean, I go in there to get bagels and I almost feel guilty for bothering them.
  • If you know it is gonna be super-windy, why don’t you bring in your trashcan?  I know you are home.  I saw you, you lazy something-something-something.
  • Why is it that when I am out of a ton of stuff from one particular store and I only have this morning to go there (or else it has to wait until Friday) and the power has to be out when I get there and there is no way to ring up a purchase?  Is it just me?
  • Why does everyone return phone calls at the same time?  Is there some law that everyone I’ve called for appointments MUST call at the same EXACT TIME?
  • Why in the heck did I take five kids to the library when they had INDOOR RECESS because it has been pouring all day? (boing, boing, boing)
  • Why is it I know I shouldn’t have anymore children because I have this tendency to bleed to death and yet I desperately want to have another child?
  • Is there some reason I suddenly crave nothing but potatoes and bread?  And I give in?
  • Is it a miracle that Bug Boy is suddenly happy and cooperative and following directions and willing to do homework without a knock-’em-out fight?  Or is there something else going on. Stay tuned.
  • Why the heck did I have to have scrapple at breakfast?
  • Why are most members of my family decent, hard-working individuals and then there’s my brother Bill?  I mean, we all came from the same family.  Why is he still living with my parents at thirty-one, not saving any money, getting pulled over by cops constantly and still acts like a total jerk?  Why won’t he grow up?
  • Why the heck did I buy those freaking rubber clogs that are so popular right now?  And WHY DO THEY HAVE TO BE SO COMFORTABLE?  ACK!  I swore I’d never wear them.
  • Why will Bugaboo have a B.M. on the toilet but will not pee?  Why is it that the instant he puts the pull-up back on he pees in it and then takes it off and asks for a new one?  Little turkey…
  • Why does it have to be so gorgeous? I just wanna goof off today, but I have food shopping to do and plants to plant, since yesterday was a total wash. Literally.  Get it?  Total wash?  Rain?  HAHAHAHAHA!  Well, at least I thought it was funny.

6 thoughts on “Things That Make Me Go Hmmmm…

  1. Angela says:

    I have another one… how many burgers can you get from a 6’6 cow? Sheesh…I need to do housework and turn off The View.

  2. 31? Give him another 9 years and then you can bang your head on the wall.

  3. Mama Bit says:

    I can help with the baby itch. You are welcome to borrow Baby Bit, that should cure you for a while. 🙂

  4. mariah says:

    PLEASE take my kids, they are teenagers
    I am SCARED!!

  5. manager mom says:

    mmmm…scrapple….

  6. You must be going to the wrong Panera. I’ve been to several locations…and the employees have been OK to friendly. My Panera complaint is when they are very busy…they give us this buzzer, which must be pretty nasty dirty because we have to return it to the basket…they can’t touch it. Why don’t they throw those things away and just call out our names? After we put it in the basket…we are going to eat a sandwich with the same hands. So now we have to wash our hands again, while our food gets cold.

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