Yup. Spending Money. Again.


April 23, 2008 by Marj Hatzell

Another therapy week, another few thousand dollars…

Seriously. I hate that we have to spend money for something that these kids should be getting for free.  The good news? Bugaboo is doing very well. He is happy, he is smiling, he giggles all day.   The therapy is going very well.  He is babbling more than I’ve ever heard.  The problem with therapy is that we don’t see just positive changes. In other words, he’s learning to sneak around.  He’s learning to trick us!  He’s building shrines with silverware (his current favorite pastime, collecting his favorite things and piling them all on the medicine cabinet in the bathroom. Like silverware.) and when I sheik in horror to find him using the toilet to drink he giggles and runs away saying, “No, no, NO!:”  Yes, sweetie, that’s right.  NO!  NOW GET THE &%^$* away from the toilet!

Don’t get me wrong.  I feel very strongly that unless we invest in him now their ain’t no point in saving for college, you dig?  It’s just so hard to see my friends signing their kids up for Kindy.  The kids that are the same age as Bugaboo. And they are all reciting their ABCs, having birthday parties, riding their bikes and playing soccer on Saturdays.  And talking non-stop.  And having playdates. Oh?  And telling their mommies and daddies that they love them.  And telling their mommies and daddies that they don’t like them.  Heck, I’d take a “SHUT THE HELL UP, MOM!”  Because I’m fairly certain that sometimes he’d love to tell me that, since I’m all, “Look, Bugaboo!  An AIRPLANE!  LOOK!  Here’s the sign for Airplane!  Airplane!  Can you say, Airplane?”


I love my boy. I love him the way he is, really.  He is one special little individual and he is very endearing. As anyone that has met him. He sure is cute!  He sure is smart!  He sure is cuddly and happy!  But, he sure is non-verbal.  And he sure is frustrated. I just want things to be easier for him. And?  I sure am selfish, because I really, really, REALLY want to hear that little pip-squeak’s voice.

Oh, and?  I’d like him to go to bed without screaming and making me take him to my bed so he can fall asleep watching Thomas the f*cking Tank Engine, mmkay?  (Yes, I need sleep, why do you ask?  Is the negativity showing or something?)

Did I mention I’m tired of being in the car all day and not having time to myself? No?  At least I got some sweet stuff at Eddie B’s today. Retail therapy makes it all better. So do potatoes with gravy for lunch.

6 thoughts on “Yup. Spending Money. Again.

  1. Trace says:

    No, I don’t have an autistic child, but I do understand how it is to look at other families with envy and desire.

  2. HG says:

    Oh the tired. It makes everything just so overwhelming.

  3. Kari says:

    Not trying to tell you what to do, but there’s got to be medical assistance for your boys that would let you get the therapy for free. I live in PA, and it was QUITE a hassle, but I did it. Because of my income the County Assistance Office didn’t want to tell me how to get a PA Access card for my autistic child. . . email me if you’re in the same boat. potatochip140 at hotmail.

  4. Anjali says:

    Nothing burns me up more than the fact that parents have to fight so hard to get the services they need for their kids.

    If I could, DG, I’d bring over some strongly brewed tea.

  5. Beth says:

    Man! Hang tough. He may not be able to talk, but trust me he loves you. He is grateful that he is secure and safe and has somebody in his life who makes him feel that way. My mother-in-law has a degree in child development and she has a sign on her door that reads; “children grow to be the love they know”. Just love him – if nothing else just love him.

  6. DG, I heart you so much for getting the important things in life. Stay strong and stay the course. You are a wonderful mother and a real role model to all of us.

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