Prose and Cons


February 29, 2008 by Marj Hatzell

Bug Boy.  Separation anxiety.  These two terms are synonymous as of late.  I go to school to volunteer and he won’t let me leave without him.  I’m going to stop going.

Bugaboo eats.  He eats crap but nothing healthy.  “He won’t starve!  Don’t give in!”  Four days without eating.

Barack Obama.  Cute, friendly-looking, popular.  Minority (kinda) but also not.  He’ll get tons of votes.  Probably won’t win.

Neighbor children.  Mostly well-behaved. Polite Boy is a great influence.  Little Miss is sweet and kind. Middle Child sucks all of the life outta me.  Much easier without her.

New Jersey. Cell Phones.  Illegal to drive and talk now.  A step in the right direction?  This Domestic Goddess thinks so.  Pet peeve = cell phone drivers.  Guilty?  As charged.

Prince Harry.  Afghanistan.  WTF were they thinking?  Sooner or later the Media finds out. Not safe now. Why do we care?  Will  gets the throne (God willing).

Recycling. Important. I live in a tiny town.  They only collect paper.  We can deposit cans and glass.  The next town collects plastic.  My can mysteriously ends up on my friends curb. Hmmmm…

Shad Roe the Dog. Doing much better.   Happier, more energetic, drinking less water.   Wait and see, wait and see.  No tumor growth, please!

Gas Prices. Higher and higher.   Greedy oil companies, no concern for the environment.  We’ll use it all up soon.  Draining our pockets dry.

Headaches. No, Migraines.  Sinus problems, post nasal drip.  February, end quickly.  Ugh, It’s leap year. One more day.

I love to cook.  I am out of ideas.   No motivation.  Organization?  Puhlease.  Write a list?  HAHAHAHA!   Let’s get takeout!  Darn, it’s Friday.  And Lent.

School violence. More and more rampant.  Kids being forced to grow up quickly.   I blame parents, lack of supervision. People keep blaming schools.  Both have some responsibility.  Parents have more.  Don’t get me started.

Tuesdays and Thursday.  Tutoring.  I leave a list.  Bug Boy completes it.  Bugaboo?  Not so much.  The list is really left for Daddy.  Maybe he will get the hint.

Diapers. Pull-ups.  What evs.  Anyways.  I’m sick of them.  POTTY TRAINING!  PLEASE!  I needs it!  He needs it.  We all needs it.  He knows when he has to go.  Stubborn child.

TomKat.  Can’t figure that one out.  Cutie Surie, Katie looks hot. Tom is an eejit.  Is she trapped or happy?  Who cares!  CUTE SURI!!!

Brit, Brit, Brit.  Someone help her!  She needs a kick in the pants and some tough love. Her parents have stepped up.  Let’s hope the courts stay out of it.  She needs therapy.  Poor little boys.

Last week: 50 degrees plus.  Sun shining, fresh air. Happy Bugaboo.  Happy Doggie.  Happy everyone!  This week, thirties.  Oops.  Twenties now. Snow expected today.  One whole inch here, DO NOT CANCEL SCHOOL! Please spare our new car. Thanks.

Haircut.  Love it.  Lost more weight. Everyone tells me I look tired.  I think I look fine.  I am tired (but that’s a different story for a different day).  I’m the same size as before babies. Did they forget what I looked like eight years ago?  Yes, I think so.

Rosacea.  Skin cancer.  Ugh.  I feel people staring.  Can’t help it, it is being treated.  Go stare at someone else. Y’all have no manners. My seven-year-old is more mature.

Taxes.  Too high. Not high enough.  Depends on who you ask.  Me?  Cheaper than private school. Good school system.  Great teachers.  Happy child.  Sometimes.  This week?  Cranky McCrankyperson.

Housework.  I should do it. I don’t wanna.  Naptime yet?  Sigh. No.

6 thoughts on “Prose and Cons

  1. Maddy says:

    Ooo dear me! You are in the thick of it. I sometime [frequently] find that my brain is in overdrive. In my case it’s probably excess coffee. Beaming you some ‘calm’ for the weekend dearie.
    Best wishes

  2. MommaHen says:

    Did I miss something??? Skin cancer???????

  3. Karen says:

    I used potty training rewards. The audio and chocolate treats were powerful incentives to fully potty train our son. He loved pushing the button hearing he is a Big Boy. He was peeing and pooping in his potty within a week. Have a look and see if this would work for you.

  4. Sarah is Ok says:

    I don’t feel like I really did potty training. My oldest simply ran around naked all the time and that was it. I used a lot of Resolve though. I don’t know what the people who see you are thinking–if you’re down to pre-baby size, that’s freakin’ awesome! I’m so jealous!

  5. Maddy says:

    Nip on over and pick up your awards dearie.

  6. Jimbo says:

    Did I just sell you a guinea pig cage last month ? Luv your BLOGs. Very funny and entertaining.

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