Rain Makes Roofers Go Away

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June 20, 2007 by Marj Hatzell

They warned me.

They told me it was supposed to pour and then rain lightly in the morning.  They told me that they won’t climb up and down ladders and cut forty-eight-inch holes in my family room if it is raining. You know, because then the house might get wet and ruined, like?  And the guys on the ladders might slip, and the electrical equipment might short out, yadda, yadda, blah, blah, blah.

When I woke up this morning and saw that it was STILL raining I was disappointed.  We have no gutters at the moment, can you say SOIL EROSION?  Now I know what gutters are for.  Keeping your yard from washing away.  I’d rather have Lake Erie in my yard (Which I do get from time to time.  See this post.).  Speaking of gutters, the roofer asked MY opinion on what type of gutter we’d like to have.  We could bring the gutter around the side and use two elbow-type-thingies to bring the gutter to the side OR we could use this very fancy double-mitered corner thingy that looks rather high-class.  So natrually I picked the thing that looked less white-trashy, because I am very high class.  I also got to tell him that the flashing for the chimney should be brown and not white, since the brown one blends with the roof and chimney better.  You see, these types of things are very important when getting a roof. You have to pick the color, y’all.  It ain’t easy.  We have literally spent two years looking at roof and siding and shutter choices for this moment. I think it is fair to say that we have done more research for this than any car we’ve bought, and that is saying alot.  Darling researches things for years…

Windows!  We have new windows!  Windows that openWINDOWS WITHOUT MOLD AND ROT!  We have WINDOW SILLS!  And trim around the windows! It looks perty! Alas, we do not currently have curtains. We have them, just not hung up and all.  I mean, they are hung, just on the laundry line in the basement because I washed them. Not on the windows because they are still working on the trim.  But they will look nice! And they open and close!  And have window sills!

The siding is done on three sides of the house.  The warped, cracked siding is gone. In its place is new, clean, smooth siding.  No cracks, no caulking, no warped spots, no leaks.

Darling has been home at eight every night the past two weeks. The late hours are driving me crazy. Husband who?  I hear the roofer is available. And he’s cute.  Not as cute as the Neurologist, who is cute in a very-intelligent-and-exotic-Indian/Asian-sort-of-way but cute in a friendly-blond-haired-blue-eyed-Irish-looks-like-we-are-related-sort-of-way.  Of course, the roof thinks I am completely nuts (as if anyone doesn’t) and there is this thing about me still being married to my current husband. At least I think he is my husband.  If not, someone is coming into the room at night when I am asleep and kissing me on the cheek and taking all the covers and snoring and I have no idea who it is.  And the same guy hits the snooze button until we are late and then strips nekkid in my room in the morning and uses up all of the hot water.  I hope it isn’t a stranger because that would be creepy.

Rain is making the roofers stay away and is holding up the job. They were seriously going to be finished 99% of it by Friday. Living through construction makes me antsy and impatient.  Because, I am never antsy and impatient. Nope, not me.  Not the artist-formerly-known-as-the-Energizer-Bunny.  Patience is a virtue my middle name.

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