April 17, 2007 by Marj Hatzell
I do not know what my problem is today.
I am in a funk deeper than the water still sitting in my backyard.
I am going to go out on a limb here and say that because the past two weeks have been hectic and stressful, I am totally crashing today. CRASH!
I have held it together (barely) for two weeks, through a nasty cold, through the worst back injury I have ever had, through fever, through Bugaboo peeing all over my house. I am thinking that I am entitled to a mental health break today.
I know my friends are wondering why they haven’t heard from me or seen me. I do call them back once in a while, but right now I just do not have the brain function for lengthy conversations about espadrilles and preschool. I do not have the energy for long walks with baby carriages or treks to the mall or IKEA. I do not have the emotional stability to hang out with my friends whose toddlers are either younger than Bugaboo and are reciting the Gettysburg address or are the same age and have been accepted to MIT (or the preschool equivalent). Is that selfish? I mean, they are the same supportive friends who pick me up when I am down, take me out to breakfast for my birthday and bring me flowers and books just because. But today I just do not want to hear about them, their kids or their lives. I just cannot do it.
I am not having a pity day, just a “I’m-not-taking-a-shower-just-because-I-don’t-have-to-go-anywhere-and-by-the-way-I-am-going-to-eat-a-crappy-lunch” day. I am having one of those days where I just need to have silence for a few hours, not answer the phone, not do anything I don’t have to. Except for the three appointments I have to make today, I am not even touching the phone. I am not going out in public. Here is where I stay. Only the bus drivers and the kids I watch will know my dirty, little, odorous secret. MWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!
Darn. Already cut and dyed my hair. Can’t do that today. Perhaps toenails? Hmmmm….